Puppies connecting............."Not right now."

I have no idea how many times I have gone over non connecting issues with owners of new puppies.  The owner sadly tells me that they think that their puppy could care a less if they were even there.  They won't sit still, won't let them pet them without nipping and generally don't have time for their human companion. Let me say to you all, "this is perfectly normal."   Busy, busy, busy...........puppies are constantly on the go and if you have another dog or dogs then there is someone to constantly be tagging along after and connecting with.

When you get a puppy it is essential to start the bonding process.  What that means is time, quality time together.  If you have another dog that means getting your puppy away from that dog and spending some one on one.  This is something that I preach often, "do it or you'll regret it."  Of course dogs being vastly different, some will do fine never being removed from their canine companion but many will just never be all that they could be.  They might also never be the dog that you wanted.  That true bond, that amazing connection unobtainable due to an intense and overriding relationship with the other dog.

Spending one on one does not have to be long and drawn out; what it means is that you need to connect.  Training is a wonderful way to help that along, that is if you are using positive training methods only.  Guidance throughout day to day is also helpful in the connection.  Life lessons throughout the day no matter how small are connecting moments.  Being there as a pillar for your dog to look up to is a big connection.  Elsa is still young and when something scary happens she will run to my side.  I do not coddle her but I do stand strong and calm showing her the way.   If you simply go through your day together without ever connecting it could take forever.  Just being together in a room is not the same as connecting.

I see how my dogs react to different people, some people connect right away and it is typically the people who are interested in the dogs.   There are people we meet who don't have time for dogs and simple see them as sort of an accessory.   Not much connecting happens with these folks and they will never get a connected response from my dogs.

Connecting takes time but the process starts from day one.  The goal is to become the person that your dog turns to in need.  That means any need.  Puppies really don't care much about connecting, they are much like toddlers and have better things to do in life.  So believe me when I say we have all gone through the "my puppy doesn't even like me" stage, as your puppy runs to see everyone but you.  It is a  process and if you are spending good one on one and connecting throughout your day to day then it is happening.  There will come a moment, maybe months from now that you see that connection and realize you are now truly connected.

Having an intense connection with your dogs is amazing, there is nothing like it.  Yesterday as I gardened, Luke came out and nudged me as he often does.  In a bent down position he nearly knocks me over with his pushing but I lean into it and we have a long and very enjoyable snuggle.  Once done I ask him "is that good?"  He stands pondering, sometimes he is good and will lay down; other times he needs a bit more before he settles.  A little later Elsa joins in the gardening; at the time I was on the other side of a small fence.  She reached through the fence and I leaned in to connect with her as she kissed my cheek.  Honestly, does it get any better?


1 comment:

Love to hear from you.