Dealing with fear



Fear - a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.

My eyes shot open and Elsa sat up.  A huge boom had awaken us both.  Elsa dove off of the bed and stood at the door.  Thinking it had just scared her I called her back to the bed.  She ignored me and went to look out the patio door.  She stood still, smelling the chilly night air.  I called her again and she went to the door.  So I grabbed my robe and we headed downstairs.  Once down in the kitchen, she didn't want out.  We head back upstairs and she stood once again at my bedroom door.  Something was wrong.  

Her ears were plastered back and her eyes wide.  She was exhibiting fear behavior.  This meant that I needed to chill.  Too often we humans respond to a fear response from our dogs by soothing, touching and holding them close.  Everything that we should not do.  Why?  Because all of these behaviors from us, further the problem in our dogs.  

Dogs are very different from us.  We communicate in different ways; and body language is the best way to talk to our dogs.   What we need to do for our dogs when they are afraid is to show them that there is nothing to fear.  I lay there quietly and called to Elsa again.  She came up and lay close.  I said nothing, nor did I touch her.  I calmly turned over and pretended to go back to sleep.  

She wasn't on the bed long before she hopped off and was back at the patio door.  I let her look out and said nothing.  She lay down on the floor beneath my side of the bed and remained there as I drifted off.  About an hour later I awoke again to feel her up close against me dreaming.  She'd decided it was finally safe and returned to bed.  
Whatever the noise was, it scared the crap out of her.   

It is so important to lead by example in a fearful situation.  Remaining calm is not always easy, but we must try for our dogs sake.  Reacting in a protective coddling manner only makes matters worse for our dog.  It convinces them that there is indeed something to worry about.  

When we lead by example by acting very "who cares" about a particular situation, scenario or environment; we help our dog to deal with frightening things.  We not only give off a calm vibe but we help them to deal with stress.  Dealing with stress can be tough for humans and dogs.  Why give them more to worry about by convincing them that their fear is real?  Even if it is real, I want my dogs to know that I will take care of it.  I will let no harm come to them and I take my roll seriously.  

Actions speak louder than words.  We cannot verbally explain things to our dogs; we must show them through our actions.  I wish I could say to Elsa "that was just a loud noise, don't worry."  I could say it but she will not understand; so I must show her through my actions.  This is essential when dealing with dogs.  

We can be called upon daily to show our dogs the way.  Sometimes minuscule issues arise; requiring us to lead our dogs through step by step, calmly learning.  Life is not always filled with rainbows; it's our job to show our dogs the way.  Hugs and kisses should be saved for times when all is well.   



1 comment:

  1. Thank you for this great advise. I typically cuddle and soothe my dog and now realize how wrong this is.

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